How in the world did I not know the term, “rumble strips?” Honestly, did you know this?Or am I not the only one who learned this as a 50-year-old? Don’t tell me I am the lone idiot, folks!
At any rate, I heard a terrific series from Levi Lusko on this whole idea of how we all need “rumble strips.” (You know, those lines or bumps in the road that keep you within the lanes… guard rails are similar in principle, but God knows we don’t want to actually hit those.)
This whole thing really hit me. What areas of life do we need some reminders on to stay focused on our lane? Who speaks into your life as a “rumble strip,” caring enough to tell you when you are out of line in your thoughts or actions? What do you personally do to ensure your thoughts and actions are aligned with your true core values? (A practical example: What movies, shows or music are you listening to that may not be aligned with those?)
Like you, I am a good person who tries to do the right thing in order to live my best life. Still, I slip off of the road at times. Often with diet or exercise. Sometimes with my thoughts about life and not being aligned fully to what I know to be true. I need to spend some time telling my “tribe” to be strong “RUMBLE STRIPS” for me.
Dear God, I hope I can handle their feedback at my age, following my personal goal of asking others to “cater to my success, not my ego,” in their honest comments.
Anyone else with me?
A few things, if you don’t mind:
Do you not find,at times, that overall our Christian culture has started to avoid being “rumble strips” because we have gotten the title of “judgmental?” How many times have you said or heard these words “I’m your friend and I will love and support you no matter what.” As opposed to “I really wish you would rethink your actions right now. Are they aligned with Godly standards? I love you and challenge you to step back and think this through.” I very much understand that there is a fine line between holding someone accountable and judgment. And I think for a very long time, the pendulum swung towards judgment and condemnation as opposed to accountability accompanied by love and grace. However, now I believe the pendulum has swung to the far opposite and – for the most part- we have just become a society of acceptance. It takes tremendous depth of character and faith in our relationships to allow someone to speak the hard things into our lives and vice versa. We have become a society held hostage by our fears of being outcast and “hurting someone’s feelings” if we speak the truth that they don’t want to hear. Our political correctness has become our stumbling blocks.
Further, are we teaching our children to challenge with grace? Are we teaching our children how to process, reason and respond when someone challenges them (as opposed to impulsive reaction)? The ability to love someone and not like their actions is a fine art that is often overlooked.
I think in life we all need a community of people who will support us but of equal and, to me, greater value is the relationships we have with those who stretch us. Who among our peers is willing to do the dirty work? Be the “bad guy”? Who is willing to say “I’m going to speak the hard stuff and I expect you not to like it. But that’s ok because my love for you is bigger than your dislike?”
Who is willing to throw caution to the wind and risk their comfort zone in order to wade into the danger zone to help a friend?
I know in life I have been the messenger. I have “shot” the messenger. I have hated the messenger and been the hated messenger. But actions speak louder than words and when building our tribes, it is imperative to seek truth and accountability. A true friend – the kind you want to keep – will challenge your thoughts, love your person and,at times, dislike your actions but in love and grace wade into the quagmire of crap you find yourself in and pull you out – regardless of the fact that it is the very thing they warned you about.
Thanks for your post today. It definitely causes me to question what my role is, do I take it seriously and am I approachable enough to those I love to allow them to speak truth to me? I would say that I have some work to do in all areas. Sigh…what can I say? I’m a work in progress.