Don’t overthink this

Ah… overthinking…

I’d love to meet the person who claims to not have ever lost a night’s sleep overthinking. They will be one of my personal heroes!

Doing just a little bit of research, you can quickly reinforce the idea that overthinking is common and that it can lead us into a downward spiral that impacts our happiness. Overthinking is a common discussion point in school corridors, the workplace, and therapist sessions nationwide. (Think: “I couldn’t sleep last night, because…”)

Overthinking can be focused on the past or on thoughts that drift toward endless possible scenarios. These may include tomorrow’s big meeting, a fun date night out, an upcoming test, or even extending into processing the distant future…What will I be doing a year from now? Ten years? Other notable examples of overthinking in a not so productive way include reliving mistakes, rehashing conversations in your mind, or allowing your mind to simply worry about the endless what ifs.

The positive side of this conversation is that we can take the mind to a place of creative problem solving, or learning from our past experiences, and see incredible personal growth. That seems like a fantastic idea. U.S. News & World Report produced a short little read in 2018 that addressed strategies to get our minds to a more productive place. In summary:

1. Catch yourself. (You can’t stop if you aren’t aware.) Learn to recognize the physical symptoms you might experience, when you’ve been replaying that stressful conversation in your mind for several minutes. If you can identify that pit in your stomach (or whatever it is) you can begin to shift your brain back.
2. Call out your thoughts. The author’s example: “For instance, turn ‘I’m a bad parent,’ into ‘I notice I’m thinking I’m a bad parent.'” Step back and observe the thought process versus thinking it’s factual. Think through a truth that proves that observation wrong if you have time… that will immediately shift your mind’s narrative.
3. Set a deadline. If you must, allow yourself to ruminate for a period of time and stick to the boundary. “I will give myself 15 minutes to think through that tough conversation, and then I will focus on solutions and a move-forward plan.”
4. Shock your senses. “Thinking is a mental activity, so the best thing to do is start doing something… anything that uses the senses can work, smell lavender oil, or do pushups…”
5. Give up perfectionism. Enough said.

Here’s to a great wrap to this week and to a September that takes us to the next level in our personal growth.