To Serve well

Serving with Excellence for a Life of Excellence

Leadership

Daily rituals of excellence

It is no doubt that if you want to lead an “epic” life – a life of purpose – that you incorporate some steadfast daily rituals that help you achieve your best self.

I am a sucker for any book, article, speaker who offers me ideas of what may be worth adding into my routine. I loved this picture for two reasons: it is a beautiful work of architecture and, the people in the background look like they are soaking up the beauty around them instead of hurrying past the moment. That’s a great ritual.

So today I am sharing 13 of my daily rituals. That’s my lucky number so it had to be 13. Hopefully at least one will strike a chord for you. They ebb and flow a bit with the season, so the start of summer may be a great time to change it up a bit. I’d love to hear some of yours, so please take time to note one or more in the comments!

  1. Get moving. My grandmother, who just passed a few months ago at 96, used to always say “You have to get up, even if you don’t feel like it.” So get to moving!
  2. Incorporate greens into every meal if possible. Yep, I am even throwing a few with some lemon vinaigrette next to my morning meal.
  3. Drink lots of water! I carry my water bottle everywhere!
  4. Use dishes you love. I had a local potter, (Erica Iman of Urban Potters) make my plates, bowls and mugs for the house. I got the idea from a hotel I was visiting for business. They served up a simple dish in a super cool bowl and I loved it. I realized that something as boring a salad or bowl of soup can be special if you know it was made by hand by someone who loves their craft. That is a gift to me.
  5. Spend time in nature. A walk with my dogs is my personal favorite, but any time outdoors is the goal. Some days it may even just be rolling the windows down in the car and enjoying the breeze.
  6. Start the day by reading from the Bible. I have done this 7 years in a row now. This year, I am following a chronological version plan via the YouVersion Bible app. I journal one thing that stood out to me and pray that I might learn, grow and engage with it if applicable.
  7. LEARN. I incorporate learning into my life anytime I can. Solo time in the car, walking on the treadmill, etc. I have a host of speakers I listen to as well as podcasts as of late.
  8. Send an encouraging message to a friend or colleague.
  9. Try to catch the sunset and snap a picture if possible. I just added this one over the past year and I love it.
  10. Read and relax. I almost always end my day with a bath and take time to read for at least an hour, and often a lot more. This time to unwind and get out of my head is just what the doctor ordered to sleep well! (I read non fiction, and generally business books, or some sort of self improvement, spiritual or otherwise similar in messaging.)
  11. Music… I need to learn to listen to it more, because I love it. I’ve tried to be mindful of this lately because there is nothing like throwing on some Kenny Chesney, Fleetwood Mac, Boston, Hillsong, Elevation Music, Lionel Richie, Alicia Keys, John Mayer, etc. It can shift your energy on the spot.
  12. Positive social media talk! I am very intentional about keeping my social media feeds positive. For example, I use Twitter primarily for business or inspiration, but I craft who I follow with a goal in mind. I unfollow those who aren’t consistently positive and thoughtful. (Overuse of social media could be on my “things I need to take out of my daily life.” I’ll save that for another blog…)
  13. Pray. My goal this year is to be a better “prayer” person. I’m good at the brief, “popcorn” prayers and I believe all prayer forms are great, but I want to go deeper and truly connect through prayer.

Your turn!

Staying within the lines: A nudge to stay on track

How in the world did I not know the term, “rumble strips?” Honestly, did you know this?Or am I not the only one who learned this as a 50-year-old? Don’t tell me I am the lone idiot, folks!

At any rate, I heard a terrific series from Levi Lusko on this whole idea of how we all need “rumble strips.” (You know, those lines or bumps in the road that keep you within the lanes… guard rails are similar in principle, but God knows we don’t want to actually hit those.)

This whole thing really hit me. What areas of life do we need some reminders on to stay focused on our lane? Who speaks into your life as a “rumble strip,” caring enough to tell you when you are out of line in your thoughts or actions? What do you personally do to ensure your thoughts and actions are aligned with your true core values? (A practical example: What movies, shows or music are you listening to that may not be aligned with those?)

Like you, I am a good person who tries to do the right thing in order to live my best life. Still, I slip off of the road at times. Often with diet or exercise. Sometimes with my thoughts about life and not being aligned fully to what I know to be true. I need to spend some time telling my “tribe” to be strong “RUMBLE STRIPS” for me.

Dear God, I hope I can handle their feedback at my age, following my personal goal of asking others to “cater to my success, not my ego,” in their honest comments.

Anyone else with me?

Dialing in to trust: A force multiplier

Trust is an essential element for any relationship.

If your children trust that they can share with you they will do so, at least more often. If you have strong trust in your relationships at work with your team and the leadership, you can accomplish what may otherwise seem (or even be) insurmountable.

In a truly great book, “The Soft Edge,” by Rich Karlgaard he devotes much time to sharing stories and research on the power of building trust in business especially. The bottom line is this: profits and customer engagement are off the charts for teams that have a strong sense of trust.

“The big lesson: You can pay for someone’s time at work, and people will show up and do what they need to do. But you can’t wrench ideas, extraordinary effort and innovative solutions from their minds. Instead, if you give trust and respect, you’ll find those great, innovative ideas readily offered.”

It is interesting to me that more leaders don’t spend more time ensuring they get this absolutely right. (According to Karl, only 19% of people trust business leaders to make ethical or moral decisions. Worse yet, only 18% trust business leaders to even tell the truth… Side note: I think this is true in parenting. We sometimes don’t think we should have to “build” trust in our homes, but I’d say that healthier homes depend on it.)

The book has some strategies for building trust, (transparency and authenticity are key…), but I won’t go into a full playbook here. As always in this blog, I hope to inspire you to consider the topic and to take action if you believe it is speaking to you. I have been in organizations where this has proven beyond true, and can personally give you the differences if you reach out to me. This is critical in our homes, communities and work. Let’s stay on top of it and grow where we can.

Raise your hand!

Today is the day to look around and assess those who surround us. Both at work, home and in our circle of friends and neighbors.

Name and claim those who inspire you to be better… those who give you strength and inspire your happiness. (Note: This does not mean they are perfect every day, but that they overall add richness to your world.) 

Now, identify those that don’t even come close. These may be those that never say “good morning” or who  engage in life from the perspective that the world circulates around them.

Now, after you have both lists, there are decisions to make. If you find yourself in a position where you simply can’t dodge the situation, the great news is that you can set the tone for how you personally are going to engage. Even the crankiest of people find themselves in a bit better mood when they are surrounded by positive energy and people who care. (They may seem annoyed, but inside, we all need this…) If they are someone that you find yourself spending time with by choice, than by all means it’s time to put a stake in the ground and realize that you truly don’t HAVE to spend your precious time in this way. (Remembering that life is indeed short and it is ours to decide how to best live our days.) 

The point of today’s thought is that we need to live inspired. We have a decision on how we show up and who we allow to impact us. Don’t settle and soak of those strength givers.

Enthusiasm: Get your week off to a rousing start

Today I lean on Tom Peters and his leadership wisdom to offer you some of what I think is absolutely BRILLIANT. In fact, I think this is a game changer for all of us. Here is a brief excerpt from his new read, The Excellence Dividend:

“NFL coaches carefully script the first few plays of the game, aiming to get off to a good start. Of course, the details of the plan will likely fall through long before play number ten.  But the scripts aims to set the course.

Beginnings are everything. A solid research finding, not a slogan. So start the week off on the right foot.

Do NOT — come hell AND high water — let the first 45 minutes of the week slip by without decisive impact. (Mr. Peters using a lot of exclamation points, bold lettering and all caps to stress his point.)

A week is a precious unit of measure. And a week is a story, a novella — it has a beginning, middle, and end. Sweating BIG-TIME on the beginning is crucial to all that follows.

Next Monday: Script your first five to ten plays (i.e. carefully launch every day or week in a purposeful fashion.)”

As always, I hope this is useful to at least one of you wonderful people. For those of you following this blog closely and read about my mom last Thursday, this particular blog pushes into perspective that we really must value our days and weeks. Our moments are precious and we can impact lives and serve so much better if we do so with intention.

(My mother is progressing slightly, so as her brain repairs itself, we continue to hope for God’s will. We greatly value all of you who have reached out.)

Creating buffer zones for an optimal life

I loved the dictionary definition of “buffer.” The noun may be my favorite and I intended on writing about the verb.

Noun: A person or thing that prevents incompatible or antagonistic people or things from coming into contact with or harming each other.

Verb: To lessen or moderate the impact of something.

Just like the bumper guards in a bowling alley keep a child’s ball on the right course, having good “buffers” can do the same for us. We tend to fill our schedules fuller than they need to be, or rather should be, and as a result we don’t end up optimizing our lives.

The slower pace of life that can be beneficial to developing better relationships through actual conversation, the ability to truly think through a tough problem, or taking the time to breathe deeply and appreciate nature (thereby making us physically healthier). These are challenged or sometimes even diminished when we don’t have the “buffer” zones built into our schedules. I am perhaps not the best person to point this out since I’m not a victor in this area, but I certainly understand and fully believe in the power of the idea. I have, over the last year, truly tried to build in some of these, and it’s very helpful.

There are a host of ideas of how to do this, including defining how many meetings you are willing to have each day, and how many weekends per month you are willing to “go out” so to speak. If you need some ideas or want to share some ideas, by all means reach out, or help the other readers by listing some in the comments.

Finally, to the last point, which goes back to my fondness for the noun version of “buffer,” I think that is a key lesson for all of us. There are people and then there are “THOSE” people. You know the ones that run on a different pace, or version of reality that tend to make us slightly crazy. We need buffer zones for those people too. In essence, I think creating healthy boundaries so we can “stay in our lane,” is the best policy. I think an upcoming conversation on boundaries may be in order! Let me know what you think!

Why do we sometimes choose the second-rate version of ourselves?

I came upon an interesting conversation via a podcast and it really resonated. I hope it does with you, too.

Here’s the thing: Sometimes we actually choose the second-rate version of ourselves. OUCH! Why would we do that?

Let me give you an example: Each year when I do the Daniel Fast for the first 21 days of the year, I feel GREAT during and after. Eating healthier, incorporating regular exercise, a diligent focus on sticking with a solid wake-up and nighttime routine coupled with less social media… it’s a game changer for me. So, why would I not live my life this way every day of the year? It’s a really good question.

I am guessing that a trained psychologist would say it is because we are accustomed to and find comfort in our routines. I mean, I really like queso and I do enjoy reading about the lives of those I love via social media.

Trying to find that “balance” of how you can “have your cake and eat it too” is the challenge we all face. My point of view is that it comes down to framing the question in a way that moves us to the potential negative side of the equation. For example: What happens if I choose more queso over having more energy and a healthier body?

I find myself living on the edge of this…trying to find the right mix of both. I suspect each year I try to “lean in” to the healthier side a bit more — but maybe only a tad bit. (The unfortunate part, however, is that as you age, the body isn’t as forgiving of that basket — or two — of chips!).

How about you? Sharing is caring, and I know we would all love to have a dynamic community tackle this topic of how to choose the best version of yourself. After all, it is there that we are meant to be, and there that we are able to serve the very best.

Accelerating growth: The value of strong teachers & mentors

This is a topic I could stay on forever. There are so many great aspects of GROWTH that it could genuinely fill our days.

The good news is that we no longer have the one-room schoolhouse with a small selection of books and references. We literally have more information to consume than we ever could ever reasonably take in.

On Tuesday, I framed up the idea of just getting started on growth. We did this through a conversation on development silly, “stupid” mini-habits. To me, the next part of this discussion is surrounding yourself with wise counsel. As in teachers, mentors, coaches, etc. So to summarize:

  1. Set a Goal
  2. Break that down into small steps so it’s doable and you set yourself up for success.
  3. Seek out the right people to help you WIN!

This may be the most important part because we were designed to be in community. We simply cannot go as far on our own. It took me a long time to realize this in the health/fitness world. I have had a trainer (shout out to the most amazing, encouraging and smart trainer there is)  for almost three years. I am highly disciplined with most things when I put my mind to it (i.e. making a decision), but I just won’t push myself during a workout without someone guiding me. It’s partly because I don’t understand the process of building and maintaining muscle, but it’s also that I just don’t like to be in pain. I’m sure many of you get it.

That’s just one pretty straightforward example. Since I was young, the teachers and coaches were the people who helped me GROW. They are so critical to all areas of our development. I would submit that they still are, but it may look a little different.

Who do you seek out for growth? If you want to be the best in your industry, have you sought out the best to help you? In my assessment, good teachers, coaches, mentors do the following:

  • Champion your success;
  • clear the path if needed (open doors to both knowledge and people that can help you); and
  • yes, hold you accountable to goal achievement.

I also think it’s pretty important that you hold the same value system and enjoy each other’s company. (It’s always best if you have fun in the process.)

Today and this weekend it would be great if you gave some real thought to this. What area(s) in your life are you trying to grow in? (Spiritual, financial, relational, career, physical, etc.) Do you have good teachers or mentors to help you? If not, develop a strategy to seek it out!

Feel free to reach out to me if you’d like to talk further on the subject. It’s a hot topic for me personally!

Rules for excellence…

If you don’t know the leadership guru of all gurus, Tom Peters, look him up. He is well into his 70s and still pushing out amazing content. I love that.

He’s most famous for co-authoring ‘In Search of Excellence,’ but his credits go far beyond that classic. I have found his book ‘The little BIG things, is probably the best I’ve read in years. In it, he outlines 163 ways to pursue excellence and most of them are brilliant. (I’m sure all are to some.) The quotes in the attached image come from this read. He wisely credits other great thinkers, including the everyday types, like lessons from the local barista.

I knew for sure when I read #62 (above) on his list that I had to share it with you.

If I were Rosesblatt (author of “Rules for Aging”), I would say that these are great suggestions for all of us. Wisely seeking good counsel and, for that matter, a wide array of viewpoints, is always something that can help us improve. I believe this is true whether you’re dealing with basic home matters, finances or, of course, fulfilling your purpose in work/school/where ever God planted you. LOVE IT.

Is there an issue right now where you could use some counsel? Someone to listen and give you a perspective? We should all seek that out this week. (Make a note now to do it… that’s what I have to do!)

The second suggestion on thanking others early and often – and even profusely – was the point of Tuesday’s “Spread Joy” blog. We cannot underestimate the power of encouraging one another.

WE MUST MAKE THIS A PRIORITY if we want to SERVE WELL!

Time well spent: next-level thinking

I thought since the year is closing in, it would be good to spend one of the last work weeks focused on a deeper topic. One that just might help you as you’re closing in on your goals and establishing your big, bold and amazing 2018 plan! (We’ll get to that soon, too. I have some great content to share.)

In Tim Ferriss’s new book, Tribe of Mentors, he showcases a transcript of the same few questions he asked about 200 people that have inspired him in some way. His question was: “What is one of the best or most worthwhile investments you have ever made?”

One of the stand-out answers for me was from Brené Brown who said, “PROBLEM IDENTIFICATION.”

That resonated because I like to move straight to the ACTION part of solving a problem. In fact, her comment was that “most of us are plagued with action bias and really struggle to stay in the problem identification part… ” The idea that getting clear and digging deep into what the root is would be pretty helpful, don’t you think? Here’s where my mind went:

When someone I love is struggling, it is easy to assume the problem is something obvious (their significant other, work, school, etc.). For the most part, it’s a combination.

When you can’t seem to work through a project at work easily, is it because you haven’t asked the “right” questions and haven’t been engaging your mind to next-level thinking?

When I’m even in “innovation” mode and ready to conquer the world with ideas for my clients, do I even know what their real problems are? What research can I do to dive deeper?

When I can’t seem to sleep, could it be because of something not immediately clear?

Answering what’s not so obvious seems like the perfect place to go when problem solving. Being more thoughtful, spending more time in research, asking better questions… yes please.

I’d love to know if this resonates with you!