We’ve wrapped up another week and on our way down the runway back to school and summer’s final long days. This week, the focus has been on OUR STORY.
Today, about the idea that “you could miss it.” This could also be thought of in how you may regret missing some of those MOMENTS, that take our breath away.
Susie Steiner, a writer for the Guardian, recapped Bronnie Ware’s well known book, “The Top Five Regrets of the Dying.” Within Ware’s book, she did a really nice job in putting together a study that is valid and can teach us all a few things from the wisdom she gained as a palliative nurse in Australia.
Here is an excerpt I think you’ll appreciate.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________
“There was no mention of more sex or bungee jumps.”
Ware writes of the phenomenal clarity of vision that people gain at the end of their lives, and how we might learn from their wisdom. When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, she says, “common themes surfaced again and again.”
Here are the top five regrets of the dying, as witnessed by Ware.
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected
of me.
“This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.”
2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
“This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.” (note to working women everywhere… we can learn from the men who forged the working world before we entered the scene.)
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
“Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.”
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
“This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.”
__________________________________________________________________________________________________
I personally appreciated this information today and I hope you will as well. For me, I am going to work on #4. I have so many great friends and I need to make the effort to make this a top priority! What are you thinking?
Life is all about our choices, and thanks to FERRIS BUELLER, my readers this week get to pause and consider if their STORY is ROLLING HOW THEY ENVISION! My prayer is that you all have taken this week to assess just that, and CREATE YOUR PERFECT STORY!